Motherhood: Dealing with Temper Tantrums
I dreaded the terrible two stage that everyone kept telling me about. “Wait until she gets to two,” I remember being told. But when that moment came, I thought, OK, what do we do now?
Elly isn’t all that fussy. She mostly goes about her day, playing, destroying things in the house, picking leaves and flowers, watching cartoons, riding her bicycle, running up and down, etc. I can’t say she is one of those kids who will cause a scene.
Nevertheless, there are those times when she decides, enough is enough, I’m going to make your day difficult! And this post is inspired by those days.
How does Elly throw a tantrum?
When my two and a half year old gets completely frustrated with me usually when she has given up on my stubbornness, she just lays on the floor either crying or just quiet. She often refuses to get up or be consoled and just insists on laying on the floor. Every once in a while she will lay there, unknowingly to me, until she falls asleep.
Other times she just cries inconsolably. Sometimes there are tears and other times there are none.
Most recently, I have noticed that she has started kicking at you when she doesn’t want to do something. The worst part of this is that when she is wearing shoes, you can really get hurt.
How do I deal with Elly’s temper tantrums?
One of the best tips I got from my favourite motherhood/baby blogs was that if the baby is throwing a temper tantrum, explain to her why you are not allowing her to do what she is complaining about, in a calm voice. There’s no point in both of you shouting since this just makes the situation worse. Then, wait for the baby to calm down.
Another piece of advice that was very enlightening was that initially the baby will be upset at not getting her way. As the tantrum progresses it becomes more like a cry for comfort. So what you do at that moment is that you can comfort the baby, reassuring her that it will be OK.
I have tried to use this piece of advice when dealing with Elly’s tantrums. I mostly just let it play itself out and once she is better we proceed to do more fun things that will help her forget what had initially upset her.
Other tips when dealing with tantrums
- Remember that you are the grown up so you are in-charge. The worst thing you can do is let your baby know that every time they create a scene they get their way. Help her understand that it is normal not to get her way all the time but do this in the gentlest way possible.
- Make sure your baby understands why you said no. What I do with Elly is explain, you can’t play with this because it will hurt you, or it belongs to someone else and is not yours, or you can’t eat this or that because you will ruin your dinner, maybe you can have a little bit afterwards. I have found this way of reasoning with her helps her understand that I am not just out to ruin her fun.
- Once you have experienced a few temper tantrums, you will get to know the situations that will lead your child to get upset. Try and avoid these by distracting the baby or guiding her past them so that that situation is not the only thing that she focuses on.
- Most importantly, remind your child that you love them and everything you do for them you are doing out of love.
Has this post been helpful? How do you deal with temper tantrums? Do share your tips below.
Thank you for stopping by. xo
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